By Chris Mogensen
The attitude inspectors are on the job. Everyone who is still sifting evidence, everyone who is still quietly asking questions about God, everyone who has not yet made an iron-clad decision to live life based on knowingly false information is constantly looking for credible sources.
Underline credible.
A few years ago I received an encouraging letter from a former engineering student who wrote about how he had come to faith in Christ in one of our discussion groups. Here is a part of it:
"One day before leaving the camp in Austria you asked me why I had come to believe in God. I didn’t at the time know exactly what to say. In fact I didn't tell you that you had been the principal influence in my conversion. During the discussions I observed and listened to you in the smallest detail. You had something really important, something that I didn’t have, that you wanted to share by spending time with us. I was kind of fascinated. Now, when I think of patience and perseverance, I think of you . . ."
A few years before getting that letter, in a soft rebuke, another student held me to a pretty high standard.
He was a part of my first student discussion group. It was the end of the semester and I invited them all to my house for the evening. There was genuine excitement and everyone looked forward to a fun time. Judy and I worked really hard at receiving them well. Specially chosen recorded music, a table of food, a few other Christian friends to round out the group. The big evening came and we could hear the noisy group of students chattering and coming up the steps. But the moment the coats were off and they were in the house, the group fell stiff and silent. What an awkward evening. It was painful to get them up off the couch.
Months later I found out why.
During a time of feedback on how the group was going and how I was doing at leading the discussions, Patrice asked if he could comment on something else. Of course, I said. On behalf of the group he asked if I'd noticed how stiff and uncomfortable they all were at my home. He said, "All of us were so excited to spend an evening getting to know your family and meeting some of your friends. I don't know why it was, but the moment we walked in the door my mind screamed at me, 'this is a trap, this whole thing is a setup.'" Then he waited for my answer.
I prayed, then apologized. I admitted my poor motivations. I had hoped that they would like my Christian friends, and that they would in turn be more motivated to explore the Bible and perhaps some day come to faith. I admitted that in fact I had not invited them just because I liked them, just because I wanted to have them in my home to meet my family and a few of my friends. I asked them to please forgive me for having a hidden plan.
Second Corinthians 4:1-2 tells us that it is definitely not by our own clever plans that we manage to have a ministry. Rather, it is "through God's mercy." He certainly has been merciful to make up for my blunders.
The verses go on to say, "we have renounced secret and shameful ways; we do not use deception, nor do we distort the word of God. On the contrary, by setting forth the truth plainly we commend ourselves to every man’s conscience in the sight of God." We commend ourselves??? If I had been writing that verse, I would have said that we commend “the Gospel message” to every man's conscience. But God says we commend ourselves. I forget that at the very beginning I am being watched to see if I pass the credibility test. I need to ask: Am I trustworthy? Are my attitudes pure? Then someone might just begin to listen to what I have to say.